Breaking news-- and wind

My last column's referenced a report of a Dutch airliner that was diverted due to a passenger's flagrant flatulence at 30,000 feet. This column received such a resounding response (at least from my big brother) that I've decided to devote this entire piece to other newsworthy incidents of a gastrointestinal character. While some readers may find this topic unsuitable for publication, I think it's...